Hail the Horror
So from my small collection I bought I've watched through some of them.
'The Funhouse' (1981) was total crap. Worst actors ever! But the mutated son's face was well made for being 80's!
And I was so excited to see this movie since it supposedly was a ''classic'' and the director's best movie (which made me drop my jaw, he made Poltergeist Waaay better than The Funhouse).
But it's about students sleeping in the funhouse, the carnival's haunted house (with them bad made dolls, haha), and they think it's romantic and shit, but they end up seeing a murder by one of the workers and then a stupid dude steals the money and they get kinda caught and hunted down.
It's a good concept, but it was so fucking terrible acting and you didn't get to see most of the killings. (I would love if Eli Roth did a remake of this movie, but he said he wouldn't.)
And the surviving girl was just... god I wanted her to die! The movie would've been better if she died! Stupid cunt.
hrm, but what I did like about the movie was the CD cover. It was awesome! twas silvery and then there's blood splatter on it! :D It looks sick!
So all in all, crap movie gets 2/10 for good CD cover. (haha)
'P2' (2007) says: Never ever work late on fucking Christmas eve, you'll get kidnapped/killed!
I liked this, it had a new twist about it.
So this girl works late on Christmas eve in the office, when she's ready to go she calls and tells her family she's on the way with the Santa suit and all that jazz.
She then proceeds to the parking garage, where somehow her car is broken down, it's dead as shit.
So she tries going back in to call a cab but it's locked, so she finds the parking guard, he helps her very willingly and even asks if she doesn't wanna celebrate Christmas with him, which she takes as a joke, but ooh is she wrong! The dude seems so fucking nice and he's good looking too! You'd never see it coming that he kidnaps her, chains her to the table and wants her to eat dinner with him! Haha, I laughed at him being so nice and trying to be her friend, as if He was the one with Stockholm Syndrome instead of the victim!
But a very good fucking concept! glad I bought it (worth more than a buck)
It's not a gory movie, it's more of a mind-fuck and nervous-horror. (nervous/stress horror are fucking great because they always get me in a great fucking mood afterwards!)
So all in all, 9/10!
Onward I saw the remake of 'Halloween' from 2007 by Rob Zombie (original 1978) and it started with the kid that calls Hancoock an 'Asshole' with French accent... he's Mikey fucking Myers! And he did it great! It starts with that you get to see why he goes psycho bitch on everything and everyone. His stepdad calls him a fag (I though he was a girl with the clown mask at first actually, he had such a highpitched voice!), boys at his school bullies him, his mom is a stripper, his sister have an ugly ass boyfriend (seriously, he looks like shit), and his 1 year old sister is a screaming lil bitch. He kills them all, except for his mother (who's out working) and little sister because he Likes her!
So he goes to juvenile prison, grows up and never talks again and only makes masks until one day he escapes (cause the guards are fuck bags) and kills everyone, and I mean Everyone! And then he looks for his little sister, who doesn't know who he is and I wanted her to die so badly, she was just so ... she's a cunt.
But otherwise it was good, but the ending was just fucking annoying! I was not cheering on her to survive, I wanted her to die when there was an half hour left of the movie. So that destroyed everything!
And because of that It'll get 5/10, though I liked the slaughter but, she ruined it!
And last but not least, 'Hostel' (2005), twas the 2-disc one <3 hehe, mostly bought it for the shower scene in the extras; naked Eli is Good Eli!
Anyways, I've seen this movie about 4-5 times before, it never gets old! Though when I first saw the Hostel movies people said: It doesn't matter if you see part II before the first one!
I was like cool! So I didn't get shit what was happening in the beginning when that dude was like: oh my god I was in the first movie and made it into the second one!
I shat on the people who said that it didn't matter.
But, oh, Hostel, yes! It's fucking torture porn man! I feel the fucking pain of the people every fucking time! It hurts my ankles, my eye, my thighs and toes! It's just so awesomely made! KNB EFX <3
And the panic in Derek's voice (plays Josh) is so fucking... you seriously feel his panic!
I love Hostel, it almost make me wanna cover my eyes but I don't wanna miss it at the same time, haha.
And I love the connection with the backpackers looking at hookers through the windows, wondering which to buy and fuck and then them being the whores for the business men looking at them and wondering whom to kill.
This movie is definitely a 10/10, the actors are good, the effects are awesome, the concept is god damn great and it's something you have to see!
I'll probably watch 'Zombie Strippers' tomorrow xD Bought it Only because Robert Englund's in it haha, sounds like shit though!
'The Funhouse' (1981) was total crap. Worst actors ever! But the mutated son's face was well made for being 80's!And I was so excited to see this movie since it supposedly was a ''classic'' and the director's best movie (which made me drop my jaw, he made Poltergeist Waaay better than The Funhouse).
But it's about students sleeping in the funhouse, the carnival's haunted house (with them bad made dolls, haha), and they think it's romantic and shit, but they end up seeing a murder by one of the workers and then a stupid dude steals the money and they get kinda caught and hunted down.
It's a good concept, but it was so fucking terrible acting and you didn't get to see most of the killings. (I would love if Eli Roth did a remake of this movie, but he said he wouldn't.)
And the surviving girl was just... god I wanted her to die! The movie would've been better if she died! Stupid cunt.
hrm, but what I did like about the movie was the CD cover. It was awesome! twas silvery and then there's blood splatter on it! :D It looks sick!
So all in all, crap movie gets 2/10 for good CD cover. (haha)
'P2' (2007) says: Never ever work late on fucking Christmas eve, you'll get kidnapped/killed!I liked this, it had a new twist about it.
So this girl works late on Christmas eve in the office, when she's ready to go she calls and tells her family she's on the way with the Santa suit and all that jazz.
She then proceeds to the parking garage, where somehow her car is broken down, it's dead as shit.
So she tries going back in to call a cab but it's locked, so she finds the parking guard, he helps her very willingly and even asks if she doesn't wanna celebrate Christmas with him, which she takes as a joke, but ooh is she wrong! The dude seems so fucking nice and he's good looking too! You'd never see it coming that he kidnaps her, chains her to the table and wants her to eat dinner with him! Haha, I laughed at him being so nice and trying to be her friend, as if He was the one with Stockholm Syndrome instead of the victim!
But a very good fucking concept! glad I bought it (worth more than a buck)
It's not a gory movie, it's more of a mind-fuck and nervous-horror. (nervous/stress horror are fucking great because they always get me in a great fucking mood afterwards!)
So all in all, 9/10!
Onward I saw the remake of 'Halloween' from 2007 by Rob Zombie (original 1978) and it started with the kid that calls Hancoock an 'Asshole' with French accent... he's Mikey fucking Myers! And he did it great! It starts with that you get to see why he goes psycho bitch on everything and everyone. His stepdad calls him a fag (I though he was a girl with the clown mask at first actually, he had such a highpitched voice!), boys at his school bullies him, his mom is a stripper, his sister have an ugly ass boyfriend (seriously, he looks like shit), and his 1 year old sister is a screaming lil bitch. He kills them all, except for his mother (who's out working) and little sister because he Likes her!So he goes to juvenile prison, grows up and never talks again and only makes masks until one day he escapes (cause the guards are fuck bags) and kills everyone, and I mean Everyone! And then he looks for his little sister, who doesn't know who he is and I wanted her to die so badly, she was just so ... she's a cunt.
But otherwise it was good, but the ending was just fucking annoying! I was not cheering on her to survive, I wanted her to die when there was an half hour left of the movie. So that destroyed everything!
And because of that It'll get 5/10, though I liked the slaughter but, she ruined it!
And last but not least, 'Hostel' (2005), twas the 2-disc one <3 hehe, mostly bought it for the shower scene in the extras; naked Eli is Good Eli!Anyways, I've seen this movie about 4-5 times before, it never gets old! Though when I first saw the Hostel movies people said: It doesn't matter if you see part II before the first one!
I was like cool! So I didn't get shit what was happening in the beginning when that dude was like: oh my god I was in the first movie and made it into the second one!
I shat on the people who said that it didn't matter.
But, oh, Hostel, yes! It's fucking torture porn man! I feel the fucking pain of the people every fucking time! It hurts my ankles, my eye, my thighs and toes! It's just so awesomely made! KNB EFX <3
And the panic in Derek's voice (plays Josh) is so fucking... you seriously feel his panic!
I love Hostel, it almost make me wanna cover my eyes but I don't wanna miss it at the same time, haha.
And I love the connection with the backpackers looking at hookers through the windows, wondering which to buy and fuck and then them being the whores for the business men looking at them and wondering whom to kill.
This movie is definitely a 10/10, the actors are good, the effects are awesome, the concept is god damn great and it's something you have to see!
I'll probably watch 'Zombie Strippers' tomorrow xD Bought it Only because Robert Englund's in it haha, sounds like shit though!
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